Buffoonery October 5 2004

BUFFOONERY


T’was Midnight in the Villain’s Lair
Shadows danced against the wall
As Challenger, a super-babe
Strode bravely through the hall.

Soft light shone on her chestnut hair
And suit of gold and black
With sturdy boots and gloves and mask
A gold cape ‘cross her back.

A softly scented, gentle breeze
Across the dark room stirred
A smile crossed Challenger’s face
When she recalled what she had heard…

“Beware the Buffoon’s evil tricks
The Slinkys and Exploding Pens
He’s dangerous with custard pies
And deadly rubber chickens!”

She reconnoitered carefully
Long time she sought her giggling foe
She rested on a statuette
And dropped two floors below!

And through her slitted eyes she saw
Dressed in Jester’s garb so fine
With Merry Bells and Evil sneer
The Buffoon; foul clown of crime.

“Welcome to my secret lair
I’m very glad you’re here
For I reserved a special trap
Built just for you my dear!”

Challenger got to her feet
And kicked him in the throat
He stumbled backward angrily;
She’d cut him off mid-gloat.

“You’ll pay for that,” the villain hissed.
“Bring it on,” she said.
He pulled a yo-yo from his belt
And aimed it at her head.

Then Pie and Punch and Jab and Chick
They battled on till late
He stunned her there and by her hair
He dragged her to her fate!

Brave Challenger awoke in fear
Her feet and hands were fettered.
She held out a courageous face,
But knew she had been bettered.

“I promised you a special end,”
Said the Buffoon with scorn.
“And when I’m finally done with you,
You’ll rue that you were born!”

The sexy superheroine
Squirmed powerless and weak
Her eyes grew wide with horror when
He kissed her on the cheek.

He ran his hand along her crest
Then with a savage tear;
He ripped her costume from her breast
She shrieked at the cool air!

He pulled her sexy costume back;
He peeled her like a grape.
Bold Challenger, a victim now
Could not prevent her rape.

The Buffoon’s men took photos
As he had his way with her.
“This isn’t right, you can’t do this
To me! I’m Challenger!”

The Buffoon’s men, then took their turns
Molesting her for days
They left her naked, bound and gagged
In a catatonic haze.

“And were you once, brave Challenger?”
The shrinks ask this timid dame.
She cuddles in her straight jacket
And shakes her head in shame.